Tag Archives: netherlands

a bit anxious.wow.

My blog is public, which is why in several posts I have explored how vulnerable I should be with my readers. But, basically, I pretty much know all of you that read my ramblings about my challenges as an expat, and how anxious all of theses challenges make me feel. Well, I thought I knew you all… But I did what I promised myself I wouldn’t do– looked at stats. Who’s reading. What countries people are in when they are reading it. From what link or app they clicked through. Hmmm… Reddit. That’s interesting. And scary. Oh I know who referenced me. How nice of her. She’s always been so supportive. Awww okay theses comments are nice. Except ONE. And the negative self-talk rushed in.

To be honest that comment wasn’t even that bad, and from someone whoprobably isn’t my audience anyway. But it was a reminder that I am public. People will have opinions. I will likely constantly reevaluate what I’m doing with this blog but, for now, I remain committed to telling my truth. I do not believe that pretending everything is just fine is beneficial for anyone. I do not want to discourage anyone from taking massive leaps in their lives if they want. I actually encourage it. Do. The. Thing. But real talk is essential if we expect people to make informed decisions. Real talk is necessary to break stigmas. Real talk has shifted my perspective on what I’m experiencing.

Guess what y’all, I was ill-prepared for what I was going to experience in Nederlands. I thought I was completely in my lane. I wasn’t even on the right highway. But would I change it? Not at all. Despite my going on about the challenges, I would not move back. I just wish I had known more of the crappy bits. And I think many of us would agree that we often think, “No one told me it was going to be like this.” My purpose isn’t to dissuade others from taking chances but to be real about what the challenges have been for me. All things that I am overcoming as I gain insight into my new home.

So to the Reddit gal, make the move to Holland, honey! Enjoy the tulips, the fresh air, the freedom to cheaply and easily roam Europe. But know black face is acceptable here. Vitamin D deficiency is an epidemic here. Dutch friends are rare for an expat here. And come with a job contract already signed or enroll in a University because it’s hard to break in here. Know all this but still, Do. The. Thing.

Photo by Aaron Burden

As a side note, I am going to start sharing some of what I am reading, watching, listening to. I’m not sure why except that it’s my blog and I want to so… there you have it. Ha! I’m always looking for recommendations so please share with me too!